Monday, May 3, 2010

Alone.....

For a number of years now I have lived alone...of choice. Some of those choices are so that I can care for some important people in my life as they need me, others are because I am not ready to share my life so intimately.....but then, it wasn't long ago I would have been physically ill at the thougth of being so open so publicly, so who knows....... Nonetheless, my point is to the right....and pun intended. This is a public image of a german short hair pointer...one that looks very like my new friend and room mate. I can't tell you how desolate things felt sometimes as I came home from work to an empty house. Even when I had room-mates it was rare that I was happy to come home to them or they happy to see me come home. My new companion is simply beside herself to see me come through that door. She makes me laugh to see her butt trying to overcome the momentum of her tail, only to create an uncontrolled wiggle of pure joyful excitement. She makes me laugh, and occasionally cry when she gets too excited and lands in a bad spot....something she seems to do a lot, and is making me wonder if she just likes to see me cringe. I talk to her....a grown man talking in high-pitched voice repeatedly telling her she is a good girl...and it was once common for me to go days without saying a word if I wasn't working. Oh, we've had our issues.....chewed work boots, toys scattered everywhere and even shredded, the occasional present to be found with a sleepy walk to the bathroom by my bare foot (say ewwww here). I have holes in my yard, flowers dug up and tossed to the side, and hair everywhere....Every Where! Folks, i just wanted to tell you how abundantly happy I am to have a place in this one's heart...to see the joy in her eyes and physical expression. I only wish I could find such in a partner a touch less fuzzy and who walks upright...at least most of the time.

5 comments:

J said...

Randy, I know exactly how you feel about your new dog, except it is 2 cats for me. The house was empty and very lonely without these two furry beasts. This is something tough to admit, but I also talk to them from time to time. Call me crazy if you must, but sometimes talking to a pet is calming. It sure beats talking to the refrigerator, lol. And I concur about finding their presents, ewwww. But there is no way anyone could take these two away from me. I hope you are having a great day! Hugs, JR

scottiestoybox said...

I am so happy you now have someone to come home to. Your new friend is an amazing delight as seen through your eyes, a true bundle of energy.

I would ask you to also see your self through her eyes: you love her with out condition, you shower her with affection, you are her knight in shining armor against a world of her loneliness. You bring her toys and treats and keep her warm and well.

So give your self a pat on the back from me and she will give you a kiss of her own I bet. You did a great thing inviting her into your home and giving her a new loving life.

Stories, thoughts, ideas, dreams, fantasies said...

Hi J & Scottie; Thank you for your nice comments...and J, I am worried - that form of insanity seems to be contagious! I talk to her all the time - -so far she has shown a limited vocabulary, though. She is so full of love. She makes me feel good, if tired.

Jay M. said...

I know EXACTLY how you feel!!! I lived alone (or alone with roommate(s)) all of my life, except for my dogs. Both have now passed, and the house has never seemed emptier, though unless I were to find a relationship with someONE, then I predict I will keep an empty house, as at my age, I don't want to chance outliving another dog, and leaving my far away (though emotionally close) family the job of finding it a home. But everything you describe is to a tee my experience, too!

Peace <3
Jay

randy said...

Hi Jay;
The very focus of this post is now snuggled warmly in my bed as I write to you in the morning chill - I wanted to tell you how happy she and I are.
I don't know if I made a post on this or not.... Gracie is a rescue dog, in that, she was rescued. She was turned over to an animal control, who had her slated for euthenasia -sp?- about an hour after the rescue organization I now work for pulled her out.
I tell you this to say that you just may outlive a dog - it is possible. But, the love, the home, the joy that you give that dog for the time you are able is not wasted or taking the dog from another family who could love it - often times, you are saving its life!
I can tell you this much about our rescue organization: if someone were to adopt from us, and died, we would take the dog back and find it a home again.
And, know - we are not unique in that. Please consider it.

hugs!
randy